Day 4: Gotcha Day

Our appointment wasn't until 2:30 so we tried to pass time this morning. We went to find walmart to get some supplies for her. 

Everything you read about Gotcha day tries to prepare you for just about any type of reaction. Some children don't cry, some scream forever, some come, some don't. They say it is best if you don't come with any expectations. So we tried to prepare that way---but you always hope for the best. Though I did not allow myself to think that she would all of the sudden see us and smile and run up and say 'mom' and 'daddy.' That just doesn't happen. 

We went into a room and filled out some papers and were able to ask some questions. Not really any answers. 

They then went to get her and opened the door and this was the first thing: 

[Updated: SHE IS OURS!!!] So here are some pics of Gotcha Day: 

This is when she first saw us (notice how optimistic her sweet face is---no idea of what is about to happen)

Here she is when who she call "Aunt Fran" she is grabbing her with all she's got. 

Gui Yu was carried into the room, wearing a beautiful pink, frilly, chiffon dress. She looked very "piow liaung" (pretty). She was scared right from the beginning. She knew we were the "mommy and daddy" coming to take her. She clung to her Nanny, she calls her Aunt Fan, and she kept saying "I want aunt Fan, I want mom". I tried to put a brave face on and not think too much about how scary and hard it is for her to be taken from the only mommy she's ever know, because if I did that I knew that I would start crying and that would only make matters worse. So I smiled and tried to bribe her with candy and toys, but of coarse that didn't work. She wasn't crying at this point, just clinging to her "aunt". But eventually they told us to just come and take her and let her cry. 

As I took her from her nanny's arms, she just started screaming and she grabed on to her nanny's shirt with all of her might and wouldn't let go. After they pried her fingers off of her nanny she just continued to cry and cry. We had a little stuffed Minnie Mouse with us because we were told that she sleeps with a Mickey Mouse every night (which to my frustration, they did not bring. In fact all they gave us were the operation notes We were eventulally able to get her to hold the Minnie Mouse, and then she just clung to it and to my shirt. The only good thing about this very dramatic and difficult scene was that she still was needing and wanting comfort. She laid her head on my shoulder almost from the start and just continued to cry. We kept saying "boo coo, boo coo", that is what they say to try to comfort a child, and I kept rubbing her back. I remembered from one of my questions that had been answered by the foster mom, that she likes her back patted and to be sung to when she is sad. So I started singing I am a child of God and I love to see the temple and A Child's Prayer. When I started singing these songs it was the first little reprieve from her crying. She still continued to cry, but stopped enought to catch her breath and take a few short fast breaths. I really felt like as I sang, the spirit communicated with her spirit, and she began to feel not as affraid. The comforting and crying and singing continued for probably a total of 30 minutes, but it felt like at least twice that long!! Finally she stopped and we were able to get a picture so that we could leave and come back to our hotel room. 

They finally just had us take her from "Aunt Fran" and Aunt Fran left. 

It was emotional for all. 

She finally just burried her head into Marsjon's arm and stayed that way for the next 20 minutes. She still continued to cry, but settled down to rythmic sobs when Marsjon started to sing. 

Any guesses on what she is thinking in this pic? 

After we got back to our hotel room, things started to go so much better. It was slow progress, but we were so happy to see her start to trust us. She layed on me for a long time and we just watched a couple of Dora shows in Chinese. Then we were able to get her to drink and eat a little bit of food, which I think did a lot of wonders for her. She was still wary of Andy, but when I had to go to the bathroom, I had to hand her over to Andy :). After that it didn't take long for her to warm up to goofy, silly Andy. He took her for a walk and by the time they came back, she had given him some smiles and even played with him and talked to him. I still haven't gotten her to do that for me. But I did get a high five from her little Minnie Mouse :). She is so sweet, and it's been fun to see little glimpses into her fun, playful personality. She is still a little wary of us, especially when we're both together, but one-on-one has been good. [Andy: So when Marsjon handed her to me, I took her for a walk to the elevator and showed her how to push the buttons and we went downstairs to the foyer and then all of the sudden she reached up with her little stuffed Minnie Mouse and popped me of the nose and smiled, she did it two more times, and as soon as our eyes met she stopped. It was a great moment--as the day went on she would all of the sudden do things like that--it is going to be fun to disover her personality! I can't imagine what it must be like for her right now!]

Seeing if she will go to Andy...it was right after this that Andy went for a walk and she teased him. 

This was the best 'partial' smile we could catch on camera. We got about 5-6 by the time the day was over. 

Just after her bath.

After an exausting, yet incredible day!!

We also gave her a bath tonight, which she did great with, and she even sat on the potty and went pee pee (whoah, that was a shocker to us), but we did learn a little more about her anatomy that we hadn't been aware of. After I rubbed her down with lotion and put her in clean, soft pj's, she layed in my arms and fell asleep while I sang primary songs to her.

I'd say all in all, it started out rough, but ended WAY better than I had ever anticipated!! 

Thank you everyone for your prayers and love! This is an experience I never dreamed of having, and now that it's real it feels a little like a dream, but we are so grateful and feel so blessed!!

We will post pictures tomorrow as soon as our adoption is 'finalized'